Thought for
this week:
The following was written by a friend and coaching client who wishes to
remain nameless. I thought this would be
a great devo thought:
Sometimes the battle wages, and
I’m not lost yet...but I have been hit. One of those arrows, one meant
specially for me and programmed to find weak places in my armor hits me. Satan
is the best bow hunter. Almost every shot he gets does significant damage. It
leaves a scar. This time, like most, he has hit me with the arrow of
inferiority. From that arrow comes a raspy voice that mimics and confirms my
worst fears from my darkest places,
“You are not enough.
You’re not good enough for God to
love you.
You’re not good enough to be a
Christian.
You’re not a good enough wife,
daughter, sister, advisor, teacher, friend.
You should have done _____
better.
You should have tried harder.
You will never be good enough.”
This arrow hurts. It strikes a
tender part of me that most people don’t see. A part that I’ve buried under
accomplishments and performance, so hoping that no one will know it’s there.
Maybe they’ll think I’m good enough by what I do. But Satan can see through
that. And I go down. My sword drops from my hand and my shield of faith falls
out of reach. I lie in the dirt and all I can think about is the pain radiating
from the wound. I believe what the arrow says. After all, I couldn’t fend off
the attack. I’m not a good enough soldier. There’s no more battlefield, no more
army, no more reason to fight. Now there is only pain. While I’m in the dirt,
bloody and fading, I feel a pair of hands lift my head up. I raise my eyes to
the owner of the hands, and it’s the Commander. He’s kneeling on the ground
next to me, resting my head on His lap. As He cleans my wound, I hear Him
speaking. His voice isn’t like the other one, fiery and dark. His words are
light and as He speaks, they work to ice and heal my hurt places.
“You are enough because I am enough. You are
enough because I say so. I chose you, part of my Royal Priesthood. Part of my
Holy Nation. Part of MY PEOPLE.
I don’t love you because you are
good, I love you because I am good. Your goodness will not affect my love for
you because you are my child and nothing can change that.
Dear one, my disciples have never
been perfect. Solomon, the builder of my earthly house, filled his house with
idols. Peter denied me. Paul persecuted my followers. My children have peace,
not because of what they have done, but because of what I have done. You are fully equipped for every good work.
Your sufficiency comes from Me. The star-breathing God is breathing life and
peace into you.
I am the only Perfect One. Why do
you keep trying to take my place? Know that I am with you in the hard
decisions. I am right there in the room and I love you. Rely on My wisdom, and
not yours.
When I created the world, I knew
Satan would enter it and draw my children away from Me. For this reason, I sent
Jesus, my precious firstborn. And in the
tomb on that third day, this war was won. His blood, his perfect blood covers
you now and always. He shed his blood so that you don’t have to stay bloody.
You are free.”
Once more, He lifts my head. This
time it rests on His shoulder. As I look down, I can still see the scar, but
the pain is gone. A calm like I have never known washes over me. And we sit.
The guilt is gone. The pressure is gone. The inferiority is gone. There’s just
me and my Father. He holds me close, wipes my tears, and hands me my shield. I
am no longer trying to run ahead of him to fight, now I am fighting alongside
Him. And let me tell you, He knows what He’s doing.
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