Monday, October 13, 2014

Awareness...

Week 42:

1 Timothy 4:16  Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers.

I can’t stand blind spots in my life.  When something I have been doing, that I was unaware of, gets pointed out, it throws me into a tailspin.  I feel as if I have been exposed and shame sets in.  Eventually, I see the revelation as a gift and become more aware in that area of my life.  I actually become more plugged in with my surroundings.


 Awareness is a key to connecting with others.  The beginning of this awareness starts with watching life and doctrine closely.  I have prided myself on self-discipline and awareness.  However, the self-discipline is currently lacking in the eating a weight department (ouch!).  As I’ve either mentioned or have alluded to in articles past, I became a poser in my young life in order to fit in.  Because of that, I developed an awareness of how I present myself.  To further that training, I hold degrees in Human Communication and speak publically regularly.


This type of awareness however, is not the awareness I needed.  This awareness does help with interaction and presentation but, there is a deeper awareness needed.  In fact, there are different aspects of my awareness that need continual stretching.  Awareness stretches like, emotional awareness, awareness of who I am in God, and awareness of God’s purposes.

The first awareness is emotional awareness.  Before this becomes judged as a “touchy/feely” topic, I want to note that I had for years repressed and numbed negative emotions.  I just did not like the pain associated with those emotions.  What I discovered in doing so was twofold.  One, I was also repressing and numbing positive emotions, mainly joy.  Two, in that suppression/numbing state, I was not hearing from God.  I was not feeling a connection to Him.  Head knowledge of God can only take me so far.  I also discovered that suppressing/numbing did not make those emotions go away.  In fact, they come back with a vengeance and show up in unhealthy ways.  Boom…blind spot!  By owning the emotion I feel, I keep it from owning me.  And…I sense the presence of God more frequently.

The second awareness is who I am in God.  Like many others, I feel unworthy of God’s love, mercy, and grace.  I am faced with my shortcomings and sin daily and will get stuck believing that I have no hope.  Yet, God, created me for His purposes.  He created me and loved me as His.  He even sent Jesus for me.  I have to be aware that I am His, created for a purpose; created in His image. 

Finally, and sometimes seemingly the hardest awareness, is the awareness of God’s purposes.  I have said many times throughout my writings that I/we must pay attention and join God where He is working.  This awareness became clear for me when I worked through Henry Blackabay’s Experiencing God material.  This study coupled with some work I have done through The Crucible Project, has helped me to see God working in His Kingdom.  Paying attention to rambling thoughts, people who enter my life, circumstances that occur, etc. has helped me to become more aware of God and His purposes.

As I journey on in life, I challenge myself and others to continue to become more aware in daily situations.  As I continue to watch my life and doctrine closely, it unlocks my emotional bondage, releases me from self-degradation, and allows me to see God in His world.

Questions/challenges:

1.      What have been some recent blind spots for you?
2.      How did you handle the pointing out of those blind spots?
3.      Where are you currently in terms of being aware of your emotions?
4.      Where are you currently in terms of being aware of whom you are in God?
5.      Where are you currently in terms of seeing God at work around you?
6.      Pay attention this week to how you approach your life from these three aspects.  Ask God to reveal to you what you need from Him in this place in time.
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