In our current Bible class at Church, the teacher has been covering the
theme “Encounters with Jesus”. Recently,
the teacher led us to the story in John
chapters 18 and
21 where Peter denied Jesus and then Peter’s reinstatement after the
resurrection.
During the discussion, the teacher spent some time defining the difference between guilt and shame. I believe it is a safe assumption that Peter experienced both. Here are the working definitions of each:
Guilt is important to help us to grow and move toward re-establishing
integrity and righteous living. This
re-establishment is based on what we have done.
Shame on the other hand, many times, drives us to re-live our sin. We begin to take on a negative message about
ourselves instead of living in our God-given giftedness. When I stay in a place of shame, I do not
believe I have value. I do not believe I
am redeemed. It affects my relationship
with God and others. For the most part,
shame can be damaging.
I was having a recent conversation with a friend I was mentoring. The subject of “Does shame have a place?” came up. It must have some place in our restoration…I could sense that in my soul. However, I could not get past the damage that shame has caused in my life and in the lives of some many others I have coached, mentored, and ministered. Yet, I know it has a place. Where is this place? How does shame produce goodness?
During this Bible class, my eyes were opened to Peter and his guilt and shame. Should Peter have felt guilt for his choice to deny Jesus three times? Yes. Should Peter have felt shame for whom he was in that moment? Yes. Guilt pointed to what Peter had chosen to do in that moment. Shame exposed a part of Peter’s character that needed an adjustment and healing from Jesus. The mistake many of us make is not bringing our shame to Jesus so that we can recognize possible “problems” in our character that need addressing. Furthermore, when we do not bring our shame to Jesus, then we cannot receive healing for our heart, soul, and character.
Let us look at what happened with Peter:
I would love to say that is how I handle shame in my life. Unfortunately, I typically allow my shame to get the best of me. I begin to believe that my character is flawed rather than believe the truth about how God has gifted me. However, Peter gives me a great example of how to handle shame. His story gives me hope in the midst of my failings. Using Peter’s example, here is a great way for me to approach my shame:
Shame and the messages associated with it is very powerful. However, with practice and intentionality,
shame is useful to expose and motivate.
The key, like peter’s story is the pointing to Jesus. Peter was so excited to see Jesus that he
jumped out of the boat and swam ashore to be with him. When I am burdened by the messages of shame that
I am “bad”, it is an indicator that I need to go to Jesus and hear truth.
How have you let shame burden you? Where do you need to go to encounter Jesus? Make a commitment to spend time with him in a familiar place. When you do, listen for His truth and healing voice.
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During the discussion, the teacher spent some time defining the difference between guilt and shame. I believe it is a safe assumption that Peter experienced both. Here are the working definitions of each:
Guilt – This
is something I have done. The message I
hear is, “I’ve done something bad.”
Shame –
This is something about me. The message
I hear is, “I am bad.”
I was having a recent conversation with a friend I was mentoring. The subject of “Does shame have a place?” came up. It must have some place in our restoration…I could sense that in my soul. However, I could not get past the damage that shame has caused in my life and in the lives of some many others I have coached, mentored, and ministered. Yet, I know it has a place. Where is this place? How does shame produce goodness?
During this Bible class, my eyes were opened to Peter and his guilt and shame. Should Peter have felt guilt for his choice to deny Jesus three times? Yes. Should Peter have felt shame for whom he was in that moment? Yes. Guilt pointed to what Peter had chosen to do in that moment. Shame exposed a part of Peter’s character that needed an adjustment and healing from Jesus. The mistake many of us make is not bringing our shame to Jesus so that we can recognize possible “problems” in our character that need addressing. Furthermore, when we do not bring our shame to Jesus, then we cannot receive healing for our heart, soul, and character.
Let us look at what happened with Peter:
·
Peter
denies Jesus three times. Guilt
exposes what he has done. We assume
shame exposes something in Peter’s character.
Peter weeps bitterly (Matthew
26:75). Peter is at a crossroads, he
could allow shame to deceive him into believing he cannot be redeemed.
·
Peter
returns to what he knows. Peter met
Jesus while fishing. He goes back to
fishing. He goes back to something
familiar. Moreover, possibly, like Jacob,
returns to a place where he encountered God through Jesus (Jacob set up altars
and pillars to represent his encounters with God and revisited them. Other Old Testament characters have similar experiences).
·
Jesus
meets Peter in that place. Jesus
speaks truth into Peter about his true character. Jesus re-instates Peter.
·
Peter
goes on to be a great leader. Filled
with the Holy Spirit and armed with his gift of passion, Peter establishes the
Church.
I would love to say that is how I handle shame in my life. Unfortunately, I typically allow my shame to get the best of me. I begin to believe that my character is flawed rather than believe the truth about how God has gifted me. However, Peter gives me a great example of how to handle shame. His story gives me hope in the midst of my failings. Using Peter’s example, here is a great way for me to approach my shame:
First – Shame can be useful to expose areas
of my character that may need work. It can show me where I am moving away from
who I truly am. I can choose to believe
I am flawed, or use it to begin deeper growth work toward moving to be God’s
man.
Second – I can do something about what shame
has exposed. The other choice is to stay
stuck. It is time to take action that is
different from how I have handled shame in the past. It is time to choose truth.
Third – I need to go back to what I
know. I need to go back to where I
encountered Jesus. Going back to
something I am familiar with and capable of accomplishing will put me in a
place to invite Jesus in to help.
Fourth – I pay attention and listen for
Jesus. I allow him to show me the truth
about my character. I begin to allow his
healing touch to help me move forward with what He has planned for me.
How have you let shame burden you? Where do you need to go to encounter Jesus? Make a commitment to spend time with him in a familiar place. When you do, listen for His truth and healing voice.
Photo Credit: Creative Commons
Consider deepening your walk with God through Christian coaching: http://growthresources.net/ Set up a FREE 30 minute call to get a glimpse of what coaching can do for you: https://calendly.com/byron-growthresources/30min
Are you a Manager, a Leader, a Supervisor? Get focused coaching. Visit - http://middlemanagercoach.com/ Set up a FREE 30 minute call to get a glimpse of what coaching can do for you: https://calendly.com/byron-growthresources/30min
--------------------------------------
Click HERE to purchase Weekly Devotional Thoughts: Weekly Applications of God’s Word on Amazon Kindle and write a review.
---------------------------------------
Don't forget to visit my Amazon links. General purchases: Click on the Banner at the top of the blog. For a list of my favorites go to: http://astore.amazon.com/weekldevottho-20
---------------------------------------
Want to live Healthy with Natural products? Click HERE
