Monday, July 7, 2014

Admission of fear...

Week 28:

Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

I have written a devotional thought using this passage before here.  This week has some similarities yet has a different flavor.  I reminded often that the Word of God is so rich with application that I usually could write several different thoughts out of a same passage.

All though out the Bible we read the words, “do not be afraid, do not fear, do not be anxious, fear not, and/or similar words or phrases.  For years I have hidden my fear thinking that I was faithless or sinful for feeling afraid in any way.  I have covered my fear, lied about my fear, avoided my fear, and/or ignored my fear.  But something stood out to me recently around these passages…an assumption of fear.  God speaks these words because He knows the subject is feeling fear or going to feel fear.  Fear is inevitable. But, like a good Church boy, I have hidden my fear for fear of sinning in my fear.



There are four major ways in which I hide my fear.  The first is through anger.  I hide both fear and sadness through unhealthy anger.  The fear creates such uneasiness that I will use my anger to back anything away that may cause be to be afraid.  On the surface, this anger seems to drive me to accomplish things.  However, instead of this anger pushing me through my fear, it actually pushes the fear far away from my consciousness only to return again, usually with my intensity. 

The second way I hide my fear is through detachment.  I deceive myself into believing that my fear is gone if I detach from emotion completely.  This allows me to appear that I have become stoic yet all the while I have the emotion of fear running strong in my heart.  So strong at times, that I end up acting in a way that I look back and ask, “What was that about?” 

A third way that I hide my fear is through analysis.  This is similar to detachment for analysis requires little to no emotion.  I begin to analyze my fear.  If I had an answer to my fear, then I can conquer it with logic.  The problem here is that it causes me to become a poser and wear a mask to hide my fear.  I become somebody I am not.  People notice my mask; react to it, causing me to be afraid that I am acting strangely.  So, I analyze, change who I am again and create the whole pattern over again.  What a vicious cycle.

The fourth way that I hide my fear; is by ignoring it and hope it goes away.  Sometimes this shows up by my recklessly pushing through my fear with being attentive of the fear.  I act as if the fear is not even there.  When I look up, I have gone down a path that is so far of course of where I should be, it takes a long time to get back to where I need to be.  Once I get back, the fear is still there. 

So, how do I deal with this fear?  Faith!  God knows I will fear.  I have to face that fear, work through that fear, and come out on the other side all through faith.  See, when God gives a “Do not fear…” statement, He also gives an instead statement.  When I have fear, I can look it in the eye and walk through it with an assurance from the “instead” statement.  An example is from the passage for this thought:  “…for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”  I must face my fear with the faith that God will walk with me through the fear to the other side.  And…I will grow from this walk. 

Questions/challenges:

1.      Where do you use anger to cover your fear?
2.      Where do you use detachment to cover your fear?
3.      Where do you use analysis to cover your fear/
4.      Where do you use ignoring to cover your fear?
5.      What steps of faith do you need to take this week to face your fear and walk through to the other side?
6.      Ask God this week to show His “instead” statement.

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